Ask Her

ויאמרו נקרא לנער ונשאלה את פיה The Midrash says from here we derive one should marry an orphan only if she agrees. The inference from the Midrash is that only for an orphan does one need her acquiescence, since she is the one who is in charge of deciding if she should be married. However, if she has a father, her father can marry her unwillingly. This means that a gentile father has the right to marry off his daughter just like a Jewish father (this is noted by Rav Yosef Engel). However, it is unclear how we know this law applies to gentiles as well?

The Gemarah Kiddushin (3b-4a) explains how we know a father has a right to marry off his daughter. We need a source for this halacha, so how do we know the same law should apply to a gentile? There is a basic chakirah discussed in the Achronim regarding whether the father's right to marry off his daughter is a right the Torah gives him, akin to an automatic shliach for his daughter, or whether the halacha indicates that the father is considered the owner of his daughter, at least vis-à-vis the law of marriage. According to the first way, it is harder to see why we should extend a chiddush of a father's rights to a gentile. According to the second approach, once we see that the father is viewed as the owner of his daughter's marriage rights, that is a halacha in ownership, as a monetary law, and the same law would be true for a gentile. (It is noteworthy that the Maharal in Gur Aryeh on this possuk assumes a gentile does not have the right to marry off his daughter.)

Rashi says on the possuk that one should marry a נערה only if she agrees; he does not specifically mention the context of an orphan. Rav Yosef Engel questions why we need to derive that a woman needs to agree to be married; in every kinyan, both parties need to agree to go through with the kinyan?

The Mesoras Hashas in Kiddushin 2b points out a contradiction in Rashi Kiddushin vs. Rashi Yevamos if the reason for the need for the woman to agree to kiddushin is because of the requirement of דעת מקנה or derived from a possuk of והלכה והיתה לאיש חר מדעתה משמע. Rav Yosef Engel says, according to Rashi in Yevamos, it would seem not to be a law based on דעת מקנה, but a possuk, and that may not apply to gentiles. However, it is difficult to understand why you would not need her to agree to be married because of דעת מקנה? This can only make sense if you assume the woman is not playing an active role in the kiddushin at all but instead she is just מפקר עצמה אצל הבעל as the Ran Nedarim daf 30 says (according to the understanding of the Avnei Miluim in many places.) (The Achronim give different explanations for the Rashi Yevamos that he is being מחדש another din of needing her דעת for kiddushin since in the context of מאמר where there is already a connection between יבם ויבמה then her דעת would not be necessary if not for another din of needing דעת, see Sharay Chayim Kiddushin.)  However, maybe Rashi doesn't mean a halacha; he is just saying we see a proper code of conduct (see also Kiddushin 61b, וצ"ע)?